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“Is this Hell or Enlightenment?”: Ten Days of Silence in Pecatonica, Illinois Continued

The following will be my attempt to summarize my ten days of silence at the Vipassana Center in Illinois.  If you want to get the gist on what Vipassana is before you read it (which I would recommend), check out this post.  It has some of the rules, guidelines and a little about the ideology- all good background for what I experienced.

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In my program, I am required to take multiple courses on drugs and addictions. Last semester I took a chemical dependency course where I was required to write a paper about popular street drugs.  One drug I chose was Ayahuasca.  Why?  Because people I knew who didn’t use drugs were talking about this substance and seemed interested. This was strange.  Here is my opening paragraph from the paper:

“If there was a chance to experience [improved] healing and wholeness in the matter of twenty-four hours, but the path to reach that end goal was going through hell, would it be a temptation?  This is not [only] a figurative hell of bad emotional places, but a literal hell of demons battling and slithering serpents, a replaying the worst experiences of one’s life, a sweating, panting, heart pounding experience complete with nausea, vomiting and diarrhea. For most people, this particular path would probably not be a temptation, which is why the drug Ayahuasca will probably never enter main stream society as anything other than a subversive and interesting sub-culture fad.  However, [according to some] for those who are willing to venture into the dangerous and terrifying possibilities inherent in using the drug, there is the possibility of a renewed self and an extended spiritual experience- a calculated risk not without serious dangers and consequences.” 

This drug was not, and is not, a temptation for me, so I want to make it clear that I do not advocate for the drug nor am I a user.  This being said, I had no idea that Vipassana would be, for me, the closest I could ever get to this experience without taking a mind-altering substance.

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